Category Archives: 12 Step Success

Step Two Concluded: The Path to Hope

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Step Two: Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

A lot of people say that the principle behind the 2nd step is hope, and I think that’s right. We hope that we can be restored to sanity, that we can live at peace with ourselves and with our writing. Yes, a lot of writers become very successful and they fight and spit and growl through the process, but that’s not my ideal. And again, I say, if I can write and handle the writing game sanely, everyone wins. I win, my critique group wins, my family wins, everyone.

But if I fight and spit and growl my way through the stress of creating, then querying, then publishing, then marketing my writing, well, it’s hard to be around all the negative energy day in and day out.

At some stage, I had to embrace the idea that me writing was good for the planet. That stories are worth the time it takes to craft them. Not just for the entertainment value, though that does have its place, but for the experience of enjoying and relishing a fine story well told. I would argue that the world is better because of Harry Potter and the Twilight novels.

I have to have hope that my stories can only make human life bearable for those who read my sometimes dark, but still hopeful books. I love the idea that the story I’m working on now just might be the next Hunger Games. Odds are it isn’t, but what if?

And while I’m pursuing that “what if,” I can play the writing game and not be full of fear, self-doubt, self-loathing, or just plain crazy.

I can be a writer who has courage and dignity. That’s the hope, and through the steps, I’ve found a lot of peace even when things have gone from bad to worse.

Because at my core, I have hope.

Step Two Continued: Atheists Are Writers Too!

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Step 2 – Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Okay, I took kind of a long break, but well, you know, life happens. Stupid life.

Let’s recap. For me, a sane writer works to improve their craft, writes on a schedule, and markets themselves and their writing with very little drama. A sane writer lives with the belief that if they continue to write, they will become better.

Nietzsche

Now, above, I don’t say the word “God.” But “power greater than” certainly points to some kind of divine force.

Oh, I have such a hard time with the God idea. I’m kind of an all-or-nothing type of guy, and if there is a God, I would want magic fireballs tumbling out of the sky and filling me with inspiration and hope. Some people have had that experience, heck, I’ve even had some of those experiences, but for me to be satisfied, burning bushes would have to happen every day of the week. Yeah, God would have to be a Vegas nightshow act to keep me interested.

However, there are a variety of powers greater than myself that are active in my life. For example, my critique group is a power greater than myself. Maybe for some, maybe for most, they can create by themselves and churn out Shakespearean perfection, but not me. I need an outside eye, a fresh look, a power greater than myself.

Not to say I take everything my critique group says as gospel. Nope. I joke that I get their comments, and then I run it by the committee. Yes, I have a group of voices in my mind, and that group gets to decide on what comments I take and what comments I bid adieu. So even by myself, there is a power greater than myself running amok in my head. A good critique will stick in your craw, and you’ll fight, but in the end, you’ll have to embrace what’s right. And you’ll know. That deep part of yourself will know what is gold and what is complete cow crap.

And as a writer, the entire writing industry is a power greater than me, but that industry, while bent on making cash dollars, is also full of people passionate about books. Yes, there are some evil frakking people out there, but from my experience, most have good hearts and love stories. They can help. Sometimes. Again, the committee gets the final say.

 

Catherine Ryan Hyde, author of the wonderful Pay It Forward, was told by a well-meaning agent to change her book and have nice people pay it forward to other nice people. Ugh. Part of what makes the book so powerful is taht the people are gritty, real, and not antiseptic clones.  Yeah, Ms. Hyde ignored that bit of “helpful” advice.

 

 

The most important part of Step Two is to let outside forces have a peek into your work and into your creative life and then be open to suggestions. A sane writer can take a good critique. And a sane writer knows when people are either stupid, evil, or useless. And you’ll encounter that. Just nod, and say thank you. A lot. I learned that from one of the old warrior writers in my critique group. Just say thank you. Don’t argue. Don’t fuss. Don’t explain. Just say thank you and move on.

In the end, the committee will decide. Or, for those with certain beliefs, the whisper of the Sacred Heart of Jesus inside you will be the final judge. Or Ganesha. I love Ganesha. The elephant-headed God of writers, thieves, and miracles. Which pretty much sums up the writer’s life.
Be open to following directions. When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Wouldn’t it be cool if you were writing and Ganesha appeared? How awesome would that be?

Again, for me to be satisfied, he’d have to show up every day. With flowers. Vegas showtime, baby, or don’t even bother.

What If There Was a God Who Wanted To Help Us? What Would Our Writing Lives Look Like?

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Step Two: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

Last week we talked about what a sane writer looks like. This week, we’ll talk about how my life would look if I were restored to sanity.  Yeah, big “what if” there, step two is all about hope.

One of the best Step Two exercises I ever did was to write down how my creative life would look, if there was a loving God in heaven actively working in my life.

Now, I have trouble with God, loving or not, and so I like to think of it as some Divine Force. That’s the language I use below.
However, if you’re not a God person at all (I adore atheists), then you can do the what if thing. What if I were a sane writer, what would my troubles look like?

I pulled the list of troubles below from a talk I give, From Whining to Writing: Courageously Creating and Overcoming the Odds. I think it’s a good list of whines.

But what would the whining look like if I weren’t alone?

Fear of Success – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would work with a spirit of service. Books can change lives. I would write in that spirit and any success would be icing on the cake.

Fear of Failure – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would only be failing if I didn’t try. The simple act of writing is the reward, and yes, I might fail in a larger sense, but I’m not writing for me. I’m writing to make the world a better place. I’m writing to touch people, entertain people, make their lives better through the ancient, sacred act of storytelling.

I don’t have time to write – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, time would open up when I least expected it. I would be aware of my schedule, and look for ways where I could fit in writing. I would have faith that things would get done even if I steal a little time to write. Though I would have to keep an open mind that the writing time I get probably won’t be perfect.

Self-doubt – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would trust that the deep part of myself knows what to write, knows what story I need to tell. If I have the desire to write, I must keep in mind that that is a gift, and I have been selected to bear witness to reality, or my own twisted perception of reality.

Critical voices – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would be given the intuitive knowledge of when to listen to the voices to improve my craft and improve my story. But then, I would also know when to ignore the voices and write like Hemingway on meth. Critiques are like diamonds in a field of manure. You have to go through a lot of crap to find the diamonds, but the diamonds are worth it. I would listen with my true heart. A good critique will stick in your craw.

Grandiose Thinking– If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would write with humility. I might not become rich and famous, I might not have perfectly clean prose, as crisp as an apple, but what I have will be mine, my own vision of my story, my characters, and how I think life works.

Perfectionism – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would know I’m not perfect, what I write doesn’t need to be perfect, and I am here to do the very best I can. I can aim at perfect, but if I fall short, that’s okay. That’s why we have editors and critique groups.

Thinking too small – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would write with courage because there is a Divine Force who knows what kind of story I need to tell, and what kind of story the people around me need to read. I can be daring. I can write huge, fat novels of truth and meaning, because I’m not alone. God is my co-writer.

Nothing Feels Right – I’m Not Inspired – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would rely on that Divine Force to inspire me during my writing time. Even when every word I type seems stupid, cliché, and stupider, I would continue to write because sometimes I don’t know if what I am writing is stupid, or genius. From the wisdom of Spinal Tap, there is a fine line between stupid and uh, clever.

Envy – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would keep my eyes on my own page. My writer’s journey isn’t about you, it’s about me. And I would have the wisdom to celebrate all victories, mine, yours, Stephenie Meyer’s. When one writer wins, we all win, because in the end, we are an enslaved race of scribblers and if one person gets freedom, well, God bless them. The Divine would help me remember that.

Too Hard, Why Even Try? – If there was a Divine Force actively working in my life, I would rely on that force to help me through the despair. If I have the drive to turn my back on television, familial responsibilities, and a lucrative job selling insurance in order to write, then I need to trust there is a reason, a purpose, for my writing. And for me to ignore that purpose, well, that would be a crime against my own nature and against God.

So that’s what sanity would look like in my writing life. Am I there yet? No, but that is the ideal.

Next week, we’ll finish up Step Two.  Or at lesat try to.