What Does a Sane Writer Look Like? Step Two and Finding Hope

Step 2 – Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

So we’ve spent weeks talking about step one, which is all about despair and being broken. I’m powerless and my life is unmanageable. I can’t do it alone. I need help.

Cool. Now, the despair drives us out of the smelly basement of our misery and up into the kitchen of hope. Kitchens are hopeful places, yeah? That’s why everyone gathers there during parties.

Step two is all about hope. We came to believe that “something” could fix us. I ain’t gonna talk about God. Okay, maybe I will a little.

A little God. Just a little pinch between your soul and mind, or cheek and gum, or something. God as chewin’ tobacco. Yeah. I can dig it.

Notice how this step says a power greater than ourselves. For some, that is gonna be the full-on trinity: Father, Son, and Paraclete (not parakeet, you slackers, look it up). For others, it might be the other trinity, Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva. For others, the other other trinity, their editor, agent, and critique group. But the idea is this: we can find help and comfort if we search for it.

I blogged recently about the idea that God can be used as a tool to help us break out of our small thinking and embrace a more creative, unknown path. The “God Idea” can give us thoughts or ideas that we might not have had unless we sought sources of strength and inspiration outside of ourselves.

Step two is about finding the courage and hope that we can be better, that we can be restored to sanity. But what is sanity? What does a sane writer look like?
Everyone is gonna define sanity a little differently, and every writer is going to be sane in a different way.

I’ll tell you what I think a sane writer looks like. A sane writer writes consistently. If I didn’t have to battle my own demons every time before I wrote, I would write every day. If there wasn’t all this drama, I wouldn’t have fantasies of the perfect time to write, and I would write when I could. Might be fifteen minutes. Might be hours on end. But I would be writing consistently.

And a sane writer puts the work first. It’s not about the fame, the money, the glory, it’s about creating quality pages. Not a lot of drama. Not a lot of gnashing teeth in the darkness. Simple work. One of my many issues is that I put my ego first. What if I suck? Who am I to think I can do this? Other people are more talented. And then all of that negative thinking freezes me up solid. Writercicle. Not very chocolatey.

No, sane writers put the work first. Even those getting paid. The work comes before food, or the food never comes.

Sane writers say no to drama. My critique group is full of published writers, and when I go there with my drama, they look at me curiously. They scratch their heads. They poke. They prod. How very interesting. Who is this angsty writer in our midst? They don’t quite get me because they don’t have a lot of drama. They know the game is hard. They know it because they’ve lived it. And drama doesn’t help that. Doesn’t make it easier. Drama just wastes a lot of energy.

Sane writers aren’t afraid of revision. The game is to write a rough draft, and then revise. Revision isn’t a big deal. Even big revisions. It doesn’t mean they suck, or should give up, or they aren’t brilliant. Harper Lee worked for years with agents and editors on To Kill a Mockingbird. So, revision? Not a big deal!

Sane writers are always working on something. They don’t write books, send off query letters, and then start watching lots of T.V. Nope. I talked with a successful children’s book writer and he said, “Always have something in the mail.” Always being querying and looking for publishers even as you work on your newest project. Sane writers do that.

Sane writers love writing. They might not always like it, but deep down, they love it, which probably makes them insane.

So this is my ideal, but I think every writer has to map out for themselves, what does a sane writer look like? What is my ideal self?

Next week, I have an exercise that helped me map this out a little more. More on Step Two next Tuesday, my lovelies!

I Get Zodiacal and Go Rogue with Paranormal Romance Author T.L. McCallan

Tamara. The “T” in the T.L. stands for Tamara, like marinara sauce. You know when I first met Tamara? Of course, I started out embarrassing myself. (He did [TL]) I was at the Rocky Mountain Fiction Writers conference, I was at a table, and in walks this smokin’ hot blonde (Aw, shucks) who sits down in this cool dress. (It was.) Before I know it, I say, “That dress has a fabulous neckline.” Well, it did. And it wasn’t about the cleavage. (There was no cleavage…it was a halter neckline that went up to my ears, for crying out loud…MEN!) Okay, maybe a little, but not for long because Tamara is a force of nature. (Only when I’m drinking or writing) She could be one of my daughters. (Wha?!) And if you know my daughters, that is saying something. (Okay) She went rogue and published a book last summer and she is rockin’ the house right. (I totally am.)

A little about the book here. Tamara, insert a short blurb about the book here. Just your normal, short synopsis.

The Eighth House is a steamy, action-packed, paranormal romance which revolves around several of the twelve houses (signs) of the Zodiac. Specifically, The Eighth House focuses on the sign of Scorpio. And in the world of astrology, the Scorpions, both male and female, rule the baby makers, which means, if they’re attracted to someone, they want to get them horizontal…and in a bad way.
Anyway, Nash Graffias is a womanizer. But it’s not his fault—he’s a Scorpio, and an Elemental, (not to mention, a man). Wherever he goes, he projects a current of erotically charged thoughts…thoughts that lure and trap any woman within a ten-foot radius. In self-imposed exile for betraying his fellow Scorpions, he is addicted to the energy of a water Elemental he cannot have.
The day he meets Rousseau, a hot Leon Elemental, things get steamy. She’s strong, she’s fearless, and she’s a redhead. (And who doesn’t love a hot, fearless, redhead?) From the moment he meets her, he senses the fire within her, but can he resist the call of his addiction to another? Furthermore, exiled Elementals are hunting…hunting for souls. Can he protect her? Can he protect her soul? But more importantly, can he find the strength to let go of his?
Each novel in the Elemental Series is loosely based on one of the twelve signs of the zodiac and the four elements with which each is associated. (fire, water, earth and air).

So Tamara and I talked for nearly an hour. (Because you wouldn’t stop talking.) My time, it is so very precious, but I gave it up to bask in the glory that is Tamara McCallan. (Oh, Lord.) This is what we talked about.

Aaron: Okay, The Eighth House is not the first book you wrote. The Twelfth House is the first book, which is actually going to be the second in the series. Is this sounding like a math problem? If The Eighth House was being read by an attorney in Chicago, traveling by train to Detroit…enough of that. (I’m sorry…what? You lost me at attorney.) Why did you go out with The Eighth House and not the Twelfth?

Tamara: Well, if I’m being honest, I thought my “starter novel” (The Twelfth House) sucked bad enough to strip the heat tiles off the Space Shuttle so I shelved it indefinitely. And I don’t think I’m in the minority with respect to writing a practice novel. Sometimes, you just have to write a 90,000 word work-o’-crap in order to prime the literary pump. You know, in the hopes that when the words finally do run clear, you actually have something people don’t want to nail-gun to the base of a tree, and then blow up with a cherry bomb or two.

What? You don’t do that with books you dislike?

So, The Twelfth House, after MUCH revision is being released at the end of May. But I may, just for the hell of it, nail-gun it to a tree and blow it up because explosives are just cool. Of course, that means I’ll have to buy a new laptop.

Aaron: You found Beta Readers from your audience. How did that work? Did you troll the local methadone clinics?

Tamara: No, but I did skulk around the local elementary school and may or may not have been seen casing a Catholic church or two. And in my defense, that arrest outside of that naval base in San Diego was a complete misunderstanding. (I should be cleared of all charges.)

Kidding. I’ve never been arrested.

But, yes, two of my beta readers were (are) fans of my work. One is a 3rd grade school teacher in Nebraska and the other, a Senior Chief in the Navy currently stationed in San Diego. They emailed me after they read The Eighth House and expressed how much they enjoyed the story. On a whim, I asked them if they’d noticed any issues with it. They were kind enough, at my request, to send me their thoughts. And that’s one of the benefits of e-publishing, because within 24 hours, I’d fixed the issues and had a cleaner, happier novel for my customers’ reading enjoyment.

Oh, and if any of you are considering this beta-reader option, in order to avoid enlisting psychopaths, shell out that $12.95 for a complete criminal history check. Totally worth it.

Aaron: How has the fan email flowing into your account helped you? Hindered you?

Tamara: Define, “flowing.”

Most of my contacts with fans are via that little known social media site called Facebook. I have a lot of Facebook friend fans who have almost instant access to me. Not that I’m really on Facebook all the time.

Why are you laughing?

Stop.

Anyway, their interest helps me market the novel because they ask questions about it and I love when they want to know more, like: What’s up with Calypso and Athan? What’s their story? And will Night have his own novel? This makes me giddy and it affords me the opportunity to let them know that The Twelfth House will be released at the end of May. It also allows me to tell them a little about it like: it’s more fantastical, a little longer, and damn if it doesn’t have some REALLY hot sex in it…hotter, even, than The Eighth House.

So the contact I have with fans via Facebook and email is actually a big help. Word of mouth, as you already know, is one of the best forms of advertising. And just to give you an idea how great it is, I ran a free promo at the beginning of March. In just 4 days, I gave away almost 1,300 novels. Most were here in the States, but 134 of them landed in Great Britain, 4 in Denmark, and 1 somewhere in south-central Europe. I utilized my Facebook and email contacts to fan the flames and after a day or so of stalking my friends, family, and fans, and asking for their help in spreading the word, the promo took on a life of its own and became a huge success, ultimately reaching Amazon Best Seller rank #420 free in the Kindle store. (Up from #269,712)

Aaron: You thought, originally, your book would be for women. Chicks. XX’s. Can I say chick? (Yes) XX chromosomes is prolly okay, only I can’t add another X. No way. (Why?) Then it would be XXX. (Sweet!) But when we talked, you said you were surprised that dudes have been picking up your book. Has that changed how you are writing other books in the series?

Tamara: That’s true. I did think my main readership would be women between the ages of 30 and 50. It is, after all, a romance, and a paranormal romance at that. I mean, hell, why would a dude be interested in reading a girly novel?

Why? Because it appears that it is not a girly novel.

I discovered this when I ran the free promo on Amazon. It seems that dudes love free things. (shocker) And when they read the novel, I began receiving emails. Most said they went into the novel assuming it was a chick read because it had been recommended by a female and was touted as a romance. But much to their surprise, they came out the back side of it wanting to kick some ass, get laid, and buy firearms. (Not always in that order, but I got the picture.)

So yeah, men love the novel. Trust me. I am just as shocked about that as you are. But when it comes to dudes, I love dudes. And the dudes in my life know how much I love them. Since I can remember, I have associated better with XY’s than XX’s so it seemed inevitable that I’d write strong male characters that XY’s could easily relate to. It also helps that I’ve spent most of my adult working life in male-dominated professions. I was a law enforcement officer for just under a decade as well as a field risk manager in the powerline and utility construction industry for several years. Consequently, those experiences and subsequent relationships defined my writing style…a style that males seem to like.

As for whether I’ll change the way I’m writing the remaining books in the series, I don’t intend to. In fact, because of the outpouring of male interest, it’s sort of solidified and validated my approach for the remainder of the novels in The Elemental Series, half of which will read from primarily a male POV.

Aaron: You did a cover swap in April. One cover for XX’s. One for XY’s. How did that work? Were you the cover model? Can I be the next cover model?

Tamara: Again, the beauty of e-publishing. I changed the cover from a hot, half-naked guy, to a hot, half-naked chick in order to placate the “masses”. Meaning, all the men who wrote me asking: What does Rousseau look like? Even though I described her rather vividly in Chapter 2, we all know that men are highly visual. They like pictures. And that is how April’s cover swap promo was born.

And no, I was not the cover model. I bought the rights to a female model’s photo and while I can’t order her around or make her clean my house, she is mine to use at literary will for 250,000 copies. After that, I need to renegotiate my contract with her. When I do, she is totally cleaning my house and weeding my garden. But for now, she’s packed away and once again, the cover sports the half-naked hot guy.

As for the sales? They really didn’t change much, and I have no idea if males or females were behind the purchases that did occur. I will say that most of the sales came from Nebraska. (Wha?!)


And yes, Mr. Ritchey, you can be my next cover model, but you’ll have to let down your hair in order to cover your nipples. My work is a XX ½, after all.

Aaron: What is your zodiac sign, and if you could swap, what zodiac sign would you swap out for? For example, I’m a freakin’ Libra. Yeah, a scale, always caught up in the drama and indecision. (True) I’d swap out for Sagittarius and I’d have washboard abs and I’d totally be this athlete, ladies man, afraid of nothing. That was my brother. Dang Sagittariuses. Sagittariusi?

Tamara: Ha! You men! Always wantin’ to know a gal’s sign. Well, if you must know, I am a Pisces. (February 20 – March 20) We are the dreamers of the zodiac. We’re sensitive, imaginative, compassionate and supposedly ultra-popular. I haven’t noticed the popular part yet, though. Maybe that happens later in life. Like just before we die and people are suddenly swarming our hospital room. Maybe that’s when.

But hey, don’t let that all that sparkly stuff about us fool ya. We have our downsides, too. It’s seems we’re also gullible, temperamental, and prone to escapism through self-medication. It’s true. And it explains why I will never have a full wine rack.

And If I could swap zodiac signs, I’d totally be a Leo. Why? Because they have great hair, and they’re bad-asses. Plus, they’re a fire sign and it would be so cool to be a hottie all the time.

Aaron: You are one of the new breed of warrior writers, e-publishing and working it. What three tips would you have for anyone who wants to pioneer out on their own and sell it like it’s Amway?

Tamara: Tip #1 – Don’t compare anything you hope to sell to Amway.

Tip #2 – If you expect to write a book, throw it up on Amazon and become an overnight best seller, you’re hittin’ the pipe. Whether e-published or traditionally published, becoming even the slightest bit successful is a lot of work. Marketing and networking become your top priority and frankly, it is time consuming and at times, exhausting, but it is a necessary part of this business of being an author.

Tip #3 – Hold your head high when people say, “Oh, you’re not a “real” published author because you’re “only” e-published.” (I love when people give me an opening like this.) Because to that, you can say, “I’m sorry? I don’t believe I understand what you mean. I just received a royalty check that says otherwise. Not sure where you’re getting your information. Perhaps you should check your facts.”

And then have them call me. I’d be happy to set them straight.

Look, if you wrote a book and people are paying you real money for it, you are a published author. Period.

Aaron: Last question, and this is about a topic I love dearly. Fear. Terror. Despair. At your very first writer’s conference, where we met, you almost walked out. What made you stay? Are you glad you did?

Tamara: For clarity, I didn’t almost walk out after I met you. (Though, sometimes I wonder…) On Day One, I almost didn’t make it to the registration table at all because I truly believed I was out of my league. I mean, there I was, surrounded by gobs of people who’d actually finished their novels, had agents, and were offering their literary wares for sale…for real money! Not to mention, I have an irrational phobia about walking into places where I don’t know anyone, especially if I have to walk through large crowds where people may or may not be staring at me. (They aren’t.) To circumvent this ridiculous fear, I was supposed to be accompanied by an author friend of mine. At the last minute, she called and said she couldn’t make it. The tipping point? I had dipped into my retirement fund to pay for the conference and I just couldn’t stomach seeing that money go to waste. So, I picked up my nametag, my XXXL swag bag, (Remember how HUGE they were?) and proceeded to find someone to latch on to and then unintentionally stalk for the next two days. (Fellow author, Betsy Dornbusch).

Am I glad I stayed? Well, this year will be my fourth RMFW conference, so yeah, I am glad I stayed. Each year, I attend with the hope that after two and a half days, I will leave with a tolerable hangover, new friends, and more great tools to help me become a better writer. But it’s interesting, because every year I almost don’t make it to the registration table. So this year, as I walk through the lobby and force my feet to move in the general direction of the volunteers sitting between me and that coveted name tag, you might hear me whispering to myself. What am I saying?

Suck it up, pick up your swag, become a stalker. Suck it up, pick up your swag, become a stalker. Suck it up, pick up your…

Hey, don’t judge. It’s my method. Where’s Betsy?

Aaron: Thank you, Tamara, you warrior–woman you! And yes, where is Betsy? Inquiring minds and all that. Thanks again!

 

Tamara on Facebook
On twitter
T.L. McCallan’s website
Tamara’s Amazon author page
Buy The Eighth House on Amazon

When Your Back is Up Against the Wall – Final Step One Post

Step 1 – Admitted we were powerless over our art and our creative lives had become unmanageable.

Previously, on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, no wait, that’s not right.  Well, last week I talked about all of my wounds. That was last week, in my last 12-Step post, but this week, well, we start the climb out. Still in step one, but inching closer towards step two, where all the hope is. Let’s catch you up.

Last week, me alone, in the basement, gnashing my teeth in the darkness.  I needed a dental dam.

Then, a light shining in the darkness, I realized I needed help. And I found people who were willing to aid a poor wretch like me.

Let’s start at home. If not for my wife, I never would have ended up in Big Sur at that writers’ workshop. She got books from the library on writing, and we went over them. She pointed out that what I was doing wasn’t working and that I needed to change. And it was a bad year, that year. I was willing to pursue this because I was so miserable. Let me tell you, if life were all cotton candy, kitties, and puppies, not much would get done. I had to be willing, and willingness for me generally comes when my back is up against the wall and my ass is suckin’ plaster. That’s also when my mind opens to other possibilities.

You’ll hear such things in 12-Step meetings. It’s colorful. And true.

So, finally, after I realized I had my head up my butt, I started to read books on writing. There are a few around. Did I do it in large chunks? Nope, ten minutes a day. It took me months to go through books, but I learned a ton, and it wasn’t the time suck that I had imagined it to be. The few minutes I spent every day were golden.

The books all said to find other artists, and they also suggested reading books on how to improve, take classes, stuff like that. And as a writer, reading successful books is what you do to improve. As Barry Eisler says, you read like a writer, and write like a reader.

I also found a critique group, I found writers conferences, I found people who could help me, and such things exist for all art forms. We don’t have to suffer alone. Suffering with other people is so much more fun. Which is why 12-step programs work. Because in a group, the suffering can turn into something life-giving.

Working in a community of writers, I got to see a variety of writing, good and bad. Analyzing bad writing is just as important as analyzing good writing. I could see where my own writing needed work. And people gave me critiques and that was crucial. Alone, I couldn’t see the whole picture. With other people, I could be far more objective.

The happy, good news is that every artist can improve, and practice is most likely worth more than natural talent. At a Pikes Peak Writers Conference, I heard a speaker talk about the 10,000 hours idea. Basically, to become an expert at anything takes about 10,000 hours, and those who can discipline themselves to do the 10,000 hours get the talent they want. I can guarantee you, Stephen King did the 10,000 hours before he got rich and famous. Some are luckier than others, but the bottom line is that there is a world of information on how to create better ideas on form, style, aesthetics, and if you only rely on your little brain, you are cheating yourself. The way I cheated myself, for years and years.

But I had to be completely willing to do whatever it took to keep on creating, and this is the magic of Step One.

To be in a position of total surrender.

To do anything to move forward, no matter what.

A lot of these belief systems I found that were holding me back I learned in step 4, 5, 6 and 7, but they all put me in a state of powerlessness and unmanageability. When I started down the path, all I needed for a good Step One was the idea that I couldn’t do it alone, that I was out of ideas, that I was stuck. Once I was there, I was ready to move forward.

I entered into a contest with a friend that the first person to reach fifty rejections would owe the other dinner. And I had another friend who was willing to proofread every query letter.

This worked. I won the contest, found a publisher, and one of my books finally found a home outside of my hard drive. And it wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t been willing to really look at how my creative life was unmanageable.

Some questions for you to ponder:

How are you powerless over your creativity?

How is your artistic life unmanageable?

Are you willing to do whatever it takes to move forward? Why or why not?

Next week!  We hit Step Two at last.  I hope you’ll come back!  Step two is where the hope is.